The Scorpion and the Frog

I always tried to rationalize why he did the things he did.  I constantly asked myself why couldn't he stop and why could he not see how he was hurting the person he claimed to love?  I tried to change every inch of myself inside and out so I didn't have any more flaws for him to dissect even though he always found more and continued picking me apart with his magnifying glass.  I think of all of the work I put into trying to make him happy hoping if I pleased him it would stop, but I only lost myself in the process.  All of this didn't matter, because it was never about me nor was it personal, it was just in his nature.  The Aesop fable of the “The Scorpion and the Frog” outlines the narcissists thinking so perfectly and I know now it didn't matter what I did or how I did it, the outcome would have always been the same.  “Once upon a time there was a scorpion who wanted to get across the lake. Once day he came upon a frog. He asked the frog if the frog would be willing to swim across the lake while the scorpion rode upon his back. The frog replied, "I am sorry Mr. Scorpion, I cannot do that because you will sting me and we will both drown." The scorpion replied, "I give you my word, I promise not to sting you, I just want to get across this lake. Besides that would be stupid to do that!" So the kind hearted frog trusted the scorpion. The scorpion crawled on his back and the frog began to swim. When they got half way across the lake the scorpion stung him viciously in the back. The frog, now mortally wounded, screamed out crying: "Why did you do that? Don't you realize that now we are both going to die and drown in the lake?" The scorpion responded, "Yes I know, but I could not help it... IT IS IN MY NATURE"

I wish in hind sight I would have paid more attention to this fable perhaps I would have trusted my instinct rather than trust a narcissist’s promise which are also not in their nature to keep. The narcissist in my life was as toxic and poisonous as the scorpion and I kept falling for his promise that he wouldn't do it again, yet every time we reached the middle of the lake he would sting me and its funny how I still felt surprised every time until I grew old and wise and no longer trusted the scorpion in my life.